The Rapture was supposed to come last month, but it seems that God’s been a bit lazy about the last judgement*, and we’re all still alive. Until next month, anyway.
Or are we?
A fact often conveniently dismissed by the Rapture-fanboy-fundamentalists is that the assumption they make about the Rapture having not yet happened is nothing more than an act of unbelievable unchristian hubris.
The hard truth is: the Rapture did take place already. In 1931. The only person who actually qualified to be raptured to heaven was Melinda Schulz, a homeless Jewish carpet seller, originally from Eimsheim, Rhein-Pfalz, Germany.
The rest of us is still here, having fun and hoping to see moar Comic Sans* on fundie websites.
* I know, I know, it’s so 1999. AND YET!