Don’t discriminate against the little grey persons, says Bob the little grey person

Guys, I must admit I’m ashamed of myself. When I first saw this picture:

Visual aid 1: the ad in question

I admit I was a little irritated. What’s wrong with those people, I thought to myself, do they really believe this is what the ideal of female beauty looks like? With  her head bigger than her torso? With grotesque stick-like hands and legs, vaguely reminiscent of the Arachnida class?

But then, Bob the Little Grey Person from the Campaign for Equal Rights for Little Grey Persons Intgl, sent me a passionate e-mail:

How can you say all those hateful things about a beautiful Little Grey Person female? Do you not see how speciecist that is? Don’t you realise how that makes us feel? We are sentient beings too, and, in fact, our culture considers big, (adorable) heads, and so-called “stick-like” hands and legs highly erotic.

Why are you so dismissive of paradigms of beauty different from the one you’re most accustomed to? Nowadays, with humanity (and by the way, do you even realise how alienating it is for us, Little Grey People, to always be excluded from the humanity‘s progress and accomplishments?) striving to be more and more accepting of plus-sized models, models with disabilities, and even dead models, one can’t help but wonder what the source of the deep-rooted prejudice and systematic discrimination against Little Grey Person models, and Little Grey Persons in general, might be.

Wow. I must say, this blew me right out of my seat. I never realised the extent of prejudice against Little Grey Person models, Bob. I’m terribly sorry for what I said, and I urge my readers to be as ashamed as I am.

Little Grey Person models are just as beautiful as other models are, and our human standards should not be applied to Little Grey Person models. I’m sorry I was such a speciecist arsehole :(

Important visual aid 2: Bob the Little Grey person and his human ally (note the uncanny resemblance to the female of the species)